initely been having a rough time lately. His family situation is disrupted and confusing. His work situation has left him feeling belittled and taken advantage of. He has been looking for another job but since he still hasn't found one, he has begun to doubt himself and his ability to succeed. His heart sincerely desires to do what is right and his flesh rebels at the unfair, corrupt world we live in. He struggles to remain right while dealing with people who only desire to hurt him. Between walking that line, trying to support a family, dealing with feelings of regret and self-doubt, I can only imagine the weight that he carries. I try to encourage him to turn his focus to Christ, I try to remind him that being thankful for our many blessings is the antidote to despair but in times of great distress I'm afraid that his anger gets the better of him. He begins to feel wronged and hopeless. I sort of know where he's coming from because of my own struggles with depression and despair. Thankfully, I can now say that God is healing me. I am not 100%, but I don't know if I ever will be. Right now, I'm thankful for the improvement! I'm blessed by my medication and by the strength that He provides through prayer, through His word and through worship. I'm not taking a Bible class this quarter and I miss it so much! I miss the accountability that comes with having to report to a class about what I'm reading. But more so, having direction about what to read and what to look for when I'm reading. I think that has been what's missing from my personal devotional times. I feel blind when I open my Bible. I don't have a direction or a purpose other than just to be with God. (Which is certainly a noble goal on its own!) I just feel like I got so much more out of my Bible when I was reading and really studying a topic; comparing book to book or author to author. It is my prayer that I can find a Bible study that stimulates me like my classes did. Or that I can find a Bible book to follow that directs me so that I can do it on my own. I certainly feel a difference in myself now versus when I was deeply involved in my Bible on a daily basis. I know that I benefit from spending time with my Lord, but I think I can be of more help to my husband too when I'm deeply rooted in the Word. I desire to be the wife that I've been called to be, and I know that will only happen through hard work and the grace of God. On that note, I think I'll go look through the many reference books I have and see if one offers the kind of study I'm looking for. Does anyone have any suggestions? God Bless!
Sunday, August 3, 2008
So much to be thankful for
My husband has def
initely been having a rough time lately. His family situation is disrupted and confusing. His work situation has left him feeling belittled and taken advantage of. He has been looking for another job but since he still hasn't found one, he has begun to doubt himself and his ability to succeed. His heart sincerely desires to do what is right and his flesh rebels at the unfair, corrupt world we live in. He struggles to remain right while dealing with people who only desire to hurt him. Between walking that line, trying to support a family, dealing with feelings of regret and self-doubt, I can only imagine the weight that he carries. I try to encourage him to turn his focus to Christ, I try to remind him that being thankful for our many blessings is the antidote to despair but in times of great distress I'm afraid that his anger gets the better of him. He begins to feel wronged and hopeless. I sort of know where he's coming from because of my own struggles with depression and despair. Thankfully, I can now say that God is healing me. I am not 100%, but I don't know if I ever will be. Right now, I'm thankful for the improvement! I'm blessed by my medication and by the strength that He provides through prayer, through His word and through worship. I'm not taking a Bible class this quarter and I miss it so much! I miss the accountability that comes with having to report to a class about what I'm reading. But more so, having direction about what to read and what to look for when I'm reading. I think that has been what's missing from my personal devotional times. I feel blind when I open my Bible. I don't have a direction or a purpose other than just to be with God. (Which is certainly a noble goal on its own!) I just feel like I got so much more out of my Bible when I was reading and really studying a topic; comparing book to book or author to author. It is my prayer that I can find a Bible study that stimulates me like my classes did. Or that I can find a Bible book to follow that directs me so that I can do it on my own. I certainly feel a difference in myself now versus when I was deeply involved in my Bible on a daily basis. I know that I benefit from spending time with my Lord, but I think I can be of more help to my husband too when I'm deeply rooted in the Word. I desire to be the wife that I've been called to be, and I know that will only happen through hard work and the grace of God. On that note, I think I'll go look through the many reference books I have and see if one offers the kind of study I'm looking for. Does anyone have any suggestions? God Bless!
initely been having a rough time lately. His family situation is disrupted and confusing. His work situation has left him feeling belittled and taken advantage of. He has been looking for another job but since he still hasn't found one, he has begun to doubt himself and his ability to succeed. His heart sincerely desires to do what is right and his flesh rebels at the unfair, corrupt world we live in. He struggles to remain right while dealing with people who only desire to hurt him. Between walking that line, trying to support a family, dealing with feelings of regret and self-doubt, I can only imagine the weight that he carries. I try to encourage him to turn his focus to Christ, I try to remind him that being thankful for our many blessings is the antidote to despair but in times of great distress I'm afraid that his anger gets the better of him. He begins to feel wronged and hopeless. I sort of know where he's coming from because of my own struggles with depression and despair. Thankfully, I can now say that God is healing me. I am not 100%, but I don't know if I ever will be. Right now, I'm thankful for the improvement! I'm blessed by my medication and by the strength that He provides through prayer, through His word and through worship. I'm not taking a Bible class this quarter and I miss it so much! I miss the accountability that comes with having to report to a class about what I'm reading. But more so, having direction about what to read and what to look for when I'm reading. I think that has been what's missing from my personal devotional times. I feel blind when I open my Bible. I don't have a direction or a purpose other than just to be with God. (Which is certainly a noble goal on its own!) I just feel like I got so much more out of my Bible when I was reading and really studying a topic; comparing book to book or author to author. It is my prayer that I can find a Bible study that stimulates me like my classes did. Or that I can find a Bible book to follow that directs me so that I can do it on my own. I certainly feel a difference in myself now versus when I was deeply involved in my Bible on a daily basis. I know that I benefit from spending time with my Lord, but I think I can be of more help to my husband too when I'm deeply rooted in the Word. I desire to be the wife that I've been called to be, and I know that will only happen through hard work and the grace of God. On that note, I think I'll go look through the many reference books I have and see if one offers the kind of study I'm looking for. Does anyone have any suggestions? God Bless!
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I'll try to think of some studies, but I know what has really been good for me as of late is to go through the Bible from the beginning, with two Bibles in my lap and a pencil in my hand. I read a chapter or so, look at the notes from both Bibles, compare and write what I get out of teh verses and what God is showing me that day from what I read. Some day, with all the notes and chicken scratches throughout, I hope to pass it on to one of the boys to show them how Mommy struggled and was inspired by the Word of God through this time in my life. I have a Bible that I did that with when I was in college and was looking through it today with all the notes and got a glimpse of what I was thinking/going through at that time in my life.
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